Monday, February 15, 2010

BENEFITS OF GROWING OLDER

1. Kidnappers are not very interested in you.
2. In a hostage situation you are likely to be released first.
3. No one expects you to run into a burning building.
4. People call at 9:00 P.M. and ask, "Did I wake you"?
5. People no longer view you as a hypochandriac.
6. There is nothing left to learn the hard way.
7. Things you buy now won't wear out.
8. You can eat dinner at 4:00 P.M.
9. You enjoy hearing about other people's operations.
10. You get into a heated argument about pension plans.
11. You have a party and the neighbors don't even realize it.
12. You no longer think of speed limits as a challenge.
13. You quit trying to hold your stomach in, no matter who walks in the room.
14. You sing along with the elevator music.
15. Your eyes won't get much worse.
16. Your investment in health insurance is finally beginning to pay off.
17. Your joints are more accurate than the National Weather Service.
18. Your secrets are safe with your friends because they can't remember them either.

Now to prove my point, yesterday, when I got home from Church - I decided to have a Lean Cuisine. I followed the instructions by taking the tray out of the carton and placing it in the oven. I then, without realizing, started the microwave for 4 minutes. When the bell rang, I was shocked when I opened the door and my dinner was not there - suddenly I remembered I had put it in the oven. Of course, I had not turned the oven on. The instructions were to cook in the microwave so why I put it in the oven (must have been a senior moment)LOL.

My next surprise was getting ready for Sunday evening service, touching up my face with powder, etc. I have a gold small can of Hydration which I spray on my face to set the powder. Somehow, I picked up the same size can except it was silver and sprayed my face all over. All of a sudden I realized I had just sprayed my face with lens cleaner. I called Jo Faye told her what happened and then went on to Church. She told me my face looked good - didn't have any wrinkles. LOL - I accidentally found the fountain of youth. LOL.

Well, I hope all of you have a good week! I hope my mind catches up with me soon. LOL.

4 comments:

  1. LOL!!!!! Maybe you should market using the lense cleaner on your face!! Thanks for giving me a good laugh tonight. I needed that! Love you!

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  2. Sharon,
    You are so funny!!! Every time I read your blog I get tears in my eyes from laughing so hard. Have a good week!
    Tammy:)

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  3. I love the line that you can tell your friends secrets because they can't remember then either! I am right there with you, Sharon! You made me burst right out loud when you said you opened the microwave and there was nothing in there. You're a hoot!

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